Finding You
by archangel5
Summary: Tristan returns home and finds Rory has changed. Can he help her before she hurts herself? Or is it too late? Dark themes.
1. Promiscuous?

Author: Archangel  
  
Title: Finding You  
  
Rating: PG-13, for now  
  
Spoilers: Up to Run Away, Little Boy, I guess.  
  
Chapter Title: Promiscuous?  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I owned CMM, would I be here? No. I'd be… doing other things. J Yep. Amy Sherman-Palladino, the WB and all those other higher-ups own 'em. I own my story, maybe a few characters along the way and that's it. So don't sue.  
  
Summary: Tristan comes home to find Rory's different. Will he be able to help her find the real her? Or is she already too lost? Majorly Trory. Starts off Jory. L  
  
  
  
Tristan DuGrey pulled into the Chilton parking lot for the first time in over a year. Military school had been tough, and his body was proof of that. Lean and sinewy, Tristan was a school god. His short blond hair was messy, in a just-rolled-out-of-bed style. His bright blue eyes were shining, and anyone who knew him knew he was up to something. Rory Gilmore sat on the steps at the entrance of the school, watching him. He looked good; she'd admit it. But she rolled her eyes at his cocky smile. Obviously he hadn't changed much in the past year. But she had.  
  
"Hey, Rory." Rory turned around, startled by the voice. A boy looked up at her, his dark eyes smiling.   
  
Rory threw him a flirtatious smile. "Hey, Jess."   
  
Jess sat down next to her. "Who's that," he asked, nodding towards Tristan. Rory turned back to the blonde boy, taking in the sight of him.  
  
"Tristan DuGrey."  
  
Jess frowned. "DuGrey, DuGrey, DuGrey. Why does that sound so…oh. Isn't he the delinquent who's supposed to be in military school?"  
  
Rory nodded, not even bothering to acknowledge the delinquent statement. "He's back."  
  
Jess laughed. "No kidding."  
  
Rory turned towards Jess. "C'mon, I'll introduce you too. Maybe you'll get along."  
  
Jess narrowed his eyes. "I doubt it. He's too… pop culture."  
  
Rory grinned. "Yeah, okay Mr. Be Like That."  
  
Jess groaned. "Are you ever gonna give me a break. It was a fluke. I was sick. Delirious! I had a temperature of 102! So I sang one Three Doors Down song. I promise it will never be a repeat performance."  
  
Rory rolled her eyes. "You knew every word." Grabbing Jess by the elbow, she pulled him along behind her. "C'mon, Mr. Danes."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Tristan watched as his old fantasy approached him with some guy in tow. She was different somehow. Her hair was the same glossy brown, her eyes the same startling blue and her full lips were still the same as well. She was a little taller but that wasn't it either. Rory Gilmore had more confidence. As she reached him, she smiled. "Tristan, what are you doing back? And to think I thought there was a possibility of a nice, peaceful life without you."  
  
Tristan laughed. "You can wish, Mary." She stuck out her tongue at him. The boy with her looked on amusedly. "Who's this?"  
  
Rory paused. "Tristan, this is Jess, my boyfriend. Jess Danes, Tristan DuGrey, AKA Bible Boy."  
  
Tristan frowned. "What?"  
  
Rory grinned. "Well, you seem so religious with your bible references so I thought the name suited you. Or would you prefer ET?"  
  
Jess was as lost as Tristan. "What," the two boys asked in unison. Tristan frowned. "Now I'm an alien?"  
  
Rory rolled her eyes and spoke slowly, as if she was speaking to a two year old. "ET. Evil Tristan. Satan."  
  
Tristan leered at her. "And you can help me produce my spawn."   
  
Tristan was surprised to see that Rory just laughed. "Maybe another time." Tristan froze, staring at her. Then he turned to Jess to check out his reaction.  
  
Jess shrugged. "What can I say? My girlfriend's a tease."  
  
Tristan was shocked, to say the least. The Rory he knew blushed at the mere mention of sex. The bell rang and the three walked to class.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Tristan sat with Jess and Rory during lunch. Looking at Jess, he asked, "When did you come to Chilton?"  
  
Jess smiled easily, swinging his arm over Rory's shoulders. "Last April. I didn't want to be away from Ror."  
  
Tristan smiled, his stomach dropping. These two were close. Closer than Rory had been to Dean. He watched as Jess got up to dump his tray and walked away.  
  
Rory leaned over the table, looking into Tristan's eyes. "I'm having a party at my dad's. You should come."  
  
Tristan nodded noncommittally, although he knew he'd go. "Yeah, maybe. Where's he live?"  
  
Rory scribbled an address on a napkin. "Call so I can tell the caterer how many meals to make."  
  
Tristan was confused. Since when was Rory so close to her dad? What had happened between her and Dean? Where was her mom? He didn't ask any of these questions though. "I'll see if I'm not busy."  
  
Rory nodded, placing her hand lightly on his forearm. "You do that."  
  
Tristan was surprised by her boldness. He looked down at her hand and then up into her eyes. "Uh, Rory…"  
  
Jess plopped back down and pulled Rory closer to him. "Is he coming?" He directed the question at Rory although Tristan was sitting right across from him.  
  
Rory shrugged. "Maybe."  
  
  
  
  
Tristan sat in his last period class, moments before the bell rang, blocking out his classmates' gossip. Then he heard something interesting. "…Rory Gilmore's party. Maybe. My parents don't really approve… She's a little promiscuous, they say. Too fast… A definite Magdalene." Tristan frowned. Rory Gilmore, promiscuous? No way. He turned around. The speaker was a redhead in the back of the classroom.  
  
"Excuse me, did you say Rory Gilmore?"  
  
The girl turned to him. "Oh, hey, Tristan. Uh, yeah."  
  
Tristan looked at her intently. "Since when his she so fast?"  
  
The girl nodded. "Oh, yeah, you were gone. For the past year or so. Ever since she moved in with her dad."  
  
Tristan wanted to know more, but he wanted to hear it from Rory herself. Instead, he asked, "How are her parties?"  
  
The girl smiled broadly. "They're great. She has everything you could ever want. Even an Olympic-size pool. The food's great and so is the beer."  
  
Tristan frowned. Beer? Rory drank? "Well, see if you can go, I'd love for you to be my date…," he trailed off, realizing he didn't know her name.  
  
"Katherine."  
  
"So, I'll see you soon, Katherine."  
  
She stood up quickly. "Oh wait, here's my number. Call me." She scribbled her number on a scrap of paper and handed it to him. He folded it and put it in his pocket before walking away.  
  
  
  
  
Rory grabbed the last of her books from her locker and turned towards the school's exit, running right into something. Someone. She looked up and saw the familiar face. "Tristan."  
  
Tristan smiled. "Hey, Rory."  
  
Rory raised one perfectly plucked eyebrow. "What, no Mary?"  
  
Tristan laughed. "Does the title still fit?"  
  
She smiled coyly. "Maybe." She glanced down at her watch. "Great, I'm late. Now I'll never make that stupid bus."  
  
Tristan rolled his eyes. "You still take the bus?"  
  
Rory shook her head. "Not usually. The car my dad gave me is being worked on today. And I just missed the bus." She smiled at him flirtatiously. "Give a ride to an old friend?"  
  
Tristan nodded. "Yeah, sure. Were we ever friends?"  
  
Rory shook her head. "Nah, I hated you."  
  
"Ouch."  
  
"I speak the truth." Rory said, taking his hand. "Guide me to your car."  
  
Tristan frowned, pulling his hand from hers. He still wanted her, but she had a boyfriend. And Jess was pretty cool. "This way."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Rory glanced at Tristan for the tenth time. He refused to even glance at her, staring straight ahead at the road. "Turn right." She was quiet for a moment. "Hey, Tris, can you come to my party?"   
  
Tristan sighed. "Yeah, sure. Should I bring anything?"  
  
"A towel, bathing suit, and a change of clothes."  
  
Tristan grinned. "Ah, can't wait to see you in your bathing suit, Mary."  
  
"You'll have the chance." They elapsed back into silence. "Turn left. Now go straight." A moment later she spoke again. "The big white house. Yeah, that one. Thanks for the ride." She kissed his cheek and jumped out of the car. Walking up the path, she called over her shoulder, "See you tomorrow."  
  
  
  
  
  
Tristan lie on his bed, confused. Rory was so different and he wanted to know why. He liked her, but it seemed like so did every other guy. And what was with her flirting. He groaned. She was a puzzle, one he wanted to solve. He took the only step he knew to getting there. Dialing the phone, he waited for an answer.  
  
"Hello," came an angry voice.  
  
"Hey, Paris, it's Tristan. I have a few questions."  
  
"About Rory." It was a statement, not a question.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Shoot."  
  
"Why's she with her dad?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"How long has she been with Jess?"  
  
"About a year, I think."  
  
"Is she a Magdalene or a Mary?"  
  
"Ouch, Tristan. I don't know."  
  
"How are her grades?"  
  
Paris let out an annoyed sigh. "Still good."  
  
"Are you guys still friends?"  
  
"Pfffft. Were we ever?"  
  
Tristan sighed. "Does she flirt with everyone?"  
  
Paris let out an annoyed huff. "God, Tris. I said a few. This is like ten questions. I need to do my Physics homework."  
  
"Fine. Sorry, Paris. Bye."  
  
"Bye. Anytime. Wait, no- not after eleven, okay. Or before ten in the morning. Bye." Tristan heard a click on the other end and set the phone back in its cradle. What had happened to his Rory? 


	2. Party Time

Author: Archangel  
  
Title: Finding You  
  
Rating: PG-13, for now  
  
Spoilers: Up to Run Away, Little Boy, I guess.  
  
Chapter Title: Party Time  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I owned CMM, would I be here? No. I'd be… doing other things. J Yep. Amy Sherman-Palladino, the WB and all those other higher-ups own 'em. I own my story, maybe a few characters along the way and that's it. So don't sue.  
  
Summary: Tristan comes home to find Rory's different. Will he be able to help her find the real her? Or is she already too lost? Majorly Trory. Starts off Jess/ Rory. L  
  
Tristan stepped out of his BMW in Rory's driveway. Rory stood at the entrance to the house, watching him. She walked over to him slowly, looking him up and down. "Tristan. Glad you could make it."  
  
Tristan froze. "Oh, hey, Rory."  
  
She took his hand, guiding him towards her house. "I'll show you the way." Tristan watched her, uneasy. He could have sworn she was flirting with him, but he had a hard time believing it. Rory hated him. She had said as much on their final day of sophomore year. Still, he couldn't help hoping she liked him. He looked her up and down. She was beautiful. As they walked to the back of the house and into a huge party, Tristan silently cursed at himself. Jess swam in the pool, laughing with a few other guys. Tristan liked Jess- he was cool. Tristan didn't want Jess to know he was having impure thoughts about his girlfriend. Jess caught Tristan in the corner of his eye and waved. Tristan nodded to him.  
  
Jess motioned for Tristan to join him. Tristan shook his head. "Nah, I think I'll wait a few minutes."  
  
Rory bit her lip. "Me too. Tristan, we have so much to catch up on. Come sit by the side of the pool with me."  
  
Tristan followed her to the chairs at the end of the pool. The two sat down in the chairs. "So," Rory said, "why did you leave military school? Get out on good behavior?" Her voice was skeptical, more like the Rory he knew.  
  
"Something like that," he said vaguely.  
  
Rory tried again. "Why'd you break into that safe?"  
  
Tristan winced. He didn't like remembering his last day before North Carolina. "I felt like it."  
  
Rory leaned closer to him in her chair. "Did you date anyone there?" She was so close to him he could feel her warm breath on his neck.  
  
"Kinda."  
  
Rory laughed. "Kinda. What's that mean?"  
  
"Not really?"  
  
Rory exhaled noisily. "Okay. Did you kiss a girl?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"See her more than once?"  
  
"Uh, I guess so."  
  
Rory paused. "Did you sleep with her?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Rory nodded. "Okay, so you had a purely physical relationship, kama-sutra-like. No emotions, just physical feelings. Simple."  
  
Tristan verified this. "Yeah."  
  
Rory sighed. "You're smarter than I give you credit for being."  
  
"I guess so."  
  
Rory nodded. "I should join Jess in the pool. Want to come?"  
  
Tristan nodded. "Sure."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Tristan watched Rory as she pulled her shirt over her head slowly. She stepped out of her shorts gracefully and smiled coyly at Tristan. "You like," she asked, posing for him. Tristan drank in the sight of her. She wore a black string bikini that barely covered her breasts. He nodded, staring at her chest. Rory rolled her eyes at him. "My face is up here, not there." Tristan looked up quickly, embarrassed at having been caught.  
  
Lowering himself into the pool, Tristan turned back to look at Rory. She stood be the side, eyeing him flirtatiously. "Help a lady in?" Her voice was sultry and low, her eyes seductive. Tristan held up his arms, encircling her waist. As her arms went around his neck, he gulped. His hands on her bare skin was sending thoughts through his mind that automatically made him feel guilty. She brought her head closer to his and as soon as she touched the water, he let go.  
  
"Uh, yeah, lets go talk to your boyfriend." Tristan felt the need to remind not only her, but also himself, that Rory had a boyfriend.  
  
  
  
  
  
Later, Tristan was sitting in a chair in the corner of the room when he felt a light tap on his shoulder. Guessing it was Rory, he tensed and turned around. He was surprised. "Oh, hi, Katherine."  
  
Katherine smiled at him, her green eyes shining. "Hey, Tris. I decided to come after all."  
  
Tristan nodded, patting the seat next to him. "Sit down." Katherine sat down and leaned towards him, her hands holding up her head. Tristan attempted to make conversation. "So, at the beginning of junior year, before I left, I don't remember seeing you. Were you going to Chilton?"  
  
Katherine shook her head. "No. My father moved to Hartford last summer because he started a firm here. Wilder and Associates. Have you heard of them?"  
  
Tristan nodded. "Uh, yeah. I think they're set up in that building on 44th street. My dad's working on a merger with them."  
  
Katherine nodded. "Oh, okay. So, that would make me… the bait. Did your father tell you to date me, Tristan?" Her voice was cold and distant, but clearly hurt.  
  
Tristan shook his head quickly. "No. Katherine, I didn't even know he was your father. To be honest, I didn't even know your last name. I asked you out because I thought you were beautiful." His voice was charming.  
  
Katherine smiled shyly. Looking down at her lap, she said, "Oh. I'm sorry. Really. It's just- I've been used before for my father's money. I have to be careful, you know?" Tristan nodded. Katherine finally met his eyes. "But thank you."  
  
Tristan chuckled. "So, are you having a good time?"  
  
Katherine grinned. "I wasn't, but now I am," she said shyly, pulling her chair closer to his.  
  
  
  
  
Rory looked on in dismay. Turning to Louise Grant, she said, "This is so not part of the plan."   
  
Louise nodded. "Your stakes have just been raised, Gilmore. I don't know if even you can come between them now that she has her claws in."  
  
Rory narrowed her eyes. "Wilder's not competition. C'mon. I ruined her relationship with her last boyfriend. And all I had to do was hike my skirt up a little higher than usual. Obviously, she's not keeping them happy. And Tristan DuGrey won't be any different."  
  
Madeline sighed. "Rory, you have to get him to fall for you. "I put a lot of money on this bet. And I know you did too. And no offense, but… your dad cut off your allowance so you need the money."  
  
Rory sighed. "I know. I did it once and I'll do it again. DuGrey will fall for me and I won't catch him."  
  
Madeline sighed. "Well, you better do something quick. Katherine has him alone as we speak."  
  
Rory nodded. "I don't know though. What should I do?"  
  
The three thought for a minute before Louise leaned over and whispered in Rory's ear. Rory nodded. "That could work."  
  
  
  
  
  
Tristan had been talking with Katherine for almost an hour before they were interrupted. "Tristan," Rory cooed, "I need your help."  
  
Tristan sighed. "I'll be back in a minute, Kat."  
  
Walking over to Rory, he noticed the gleam in her eyes. She knew something. "What do you want," he asked almost gruffly.  
  
Rory sighed, batting her eyes at him flirtatiously. "I don't want to get burned." She handed him a bottle of sunscreen. "Would you rub it onto my back for me?"  
  
Tristan narrowed his eyes. "Where's Jess?"  
  
Rory laughed. "Having a few beers with his friends."  
  
Tristan sighed. "Why me, Rory?"  
  
Rory took a step closer to him. "Because I don't want some ugly, little nerdy guy helping me. It will look bad for my image." She pouted. "Please."  
  
Tristan sighed. "Fine. Lay down." Rory laid down on her towel and Tristan kneeled next to her. Squeezing the solution onto his hand, he sighed. Pushing her hair off her neck, he massaged the sunscreen into her neck.  
  
Rory moaned. "Mmm. That feels good. A little lower. To the right. Mmm. Right there. Yeah. That feels so good." Tristan groaned. Rory knew how to affect him.  
  
  
  
  
  
Paris Gellar watched the display in dismay. Rory Gilmore had the perfect boyfriend, the perfect life, and she strung Tristan along. The girl was sick. Paris knew Rory didn't operate without a hidden agenda. She just couldn't figure out what it was.  
  
"Hey," a voice greeted her.  
  
Paris spun around. "Oh, hi, Danes. I thought you were with Chris and Steve."  
  
Jess shook his head. "Uh uh. My uncle already said if I drink anymore he'll throw me out." Jess looked around. "Where's Rory?"  
  
Paris pointed. "Over there. Making a fool of herself and Tristan."  
  
Jess laughed. "Man, she is such a friggin' tease."  
  
Paris raised her eyebrows. "You're not jealous?"  
  
Jess shook his head. "Nah. There's nothing there. It's probably just another stupid game she's playing with Louise. Plus, she hates Katherine Wilder. Wasn't she with DuGrey earlier?"  
  
Paris nodded. "Yeah. I don't know, Danes. Keep an eye on her."  
  
Jess nodded. "Yeah, sure. I have to get going. I promised Luke I'd help him close."  
  
Paris sighed. "And let me guess. You're running late and you want me to tell your girlfriend you left."  
  
Jess grinned. "You're the best, Gellar." He turned around and walked away.  
  
Paris turned back towards Rory and noticed Tristan was back talking to Katherine. "Yeah, Jess. I'm the best," she said under her breath. She watched Rory as she threw her head back and laughed at something some random guy said. "Then how the hell did she get you," she thought. 


	3. Threats and Secrets

Author: Archangel  
  
Title: Finding You  
  
Rating: R  
  
Spoilers: Up to Run Away, Little Boy, I guess.  
  
Chapter Title: Threats and Secrets  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I owned CMM, would I be here? No. I'd be… doing other things. J Yep. Amy Sherman-Palladino, the WB and all those other higher-ups own 'em. I own my story, maybe a few characters along the way and that's it. So don't sue.  
  
Summary: Tristan comes home to find Rory's different. Will he be able to help her find the real her? Or is she already too lost? Majorly Trory. Starts off Jess/ Rory. L  
  
  
  
  
  
Louise Grant lay on her bed, looking across the room at Rory, who sat in her desk chair. She rolled her eyes as Rory continued to rant. "What the hell? Tristan should have been mine by now. That Katherine girl annoys me so much. Like she's actually competition. I stole Ben from her, didn't I? She didn't even see it coming. And Tristan shouldn't be any harder. If he was like he was before he left…" Rory trailed off, not completing her sentence.  
  
Louise sighed. "You wouldn't even have to try."  
  
Rory nodded. "Exactly. He would have done anything for me then. I just didn't get it. And now that I do and I want to take advantage of it, he's his own person. And I throw myself at him. The old Tristan would have already slept with at least a dozen girls."  
  
Louise raised one eyebrow. "Is that what you want? To sleep with him? No offense, Ror, but you are still a Mary."  
  
Rory cut her off. "Oh, shut up. No one else knows that. He doesn't."  
  
The phone rang and Louise reached over and grabbed it. "Oh, hi, Grant. No. Rory's here… Yeah. Sounds good…I know. He changed a lot… Twice…It didn't mean anything…Yeah…I gotta go. I'll talk to you later…I love you, too."  
  
Rory had paused in her tirade to listen to Louise's conversation. "Louise, that is seriously sick."  
  
Louise looked up innocently. "What?"  
  
Rory rolled her eyes. "You know what. You love yourself. The only reason you're with him is he reminds you of yourself."  
  
"And how's that?"  
  
Rory sighed. "C'mon. His first name is your last name."  
  
Louise nodded. "Hmm. I wonder if a guy could take his wife's last name when they get married. Grant Grant. Has a ring to it, doesn't it?" Her answer came in the form of a pillow to her face.  
  
  
  
  
  
Tristan sat in the Gellars' drawing room, waiting for Paris. When she finally came downstairs, he wished she hadn't. The look on her face told him her company wouldn't be enjoyable. "What do you want," she snapped.  
  
"What you know," he answered calmly.  
  
"About…"  
  
Tristan sighed. "You know the answer to that."  
  
Paris rolled her eyes. "Rory Gilmore. How'd I know? That's what everyone wants. Well, Tristan, this may be a surprise to you, but guess what. We…are…not…friends."  
  
Tristan nodded. "I know. But you need to know more than me. What happened to her mom?"  
  
Paris shrugged. "We've been through this. I don't know."  
  
Tristan tried again. "Who are her friends now?"  
  
Paris smirked. "Louise, Madeline, and…Summer."  
  
Tristan was shocked. "Are you serious? Summer?"  
  
Paris nodded. "Yep. I wish I wasn't. She drained the last ounce of good out of that girl. Anyways, Summer wanted Ben so she recruited Rory for help."  
  
Tristan was lost. "Who's Ben? How could Rory help?"  
  
"Ben Grigas. Katherine Wilder's boyfriend at the time. And Ben, well, he had a huge crush on Rory."  
  
Tristan scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion. "And Summer wanted HER help?"  
  
Paris confirmed this with a quick nod. "Yes. Rory turned full-slut, hemming her skirt so it barely covered her butt; Ben lost control. Grabbed her, kissed her. In the middle of the cafeteria. In front of Katherine. Katherine dumped him. Rory talked to Ben, you know, thanks-but-no-thanks, I'm-above-you, that kind of talk. Summer…licked Ben's wounds."  
  
Tristan shook his head in disgust. "Yuck."  
  
Paris nodded. "Any other questions?"  
  
Tristan nodded. "Why does Jess stay with her?"  
  
Paris's face fell. "He's addicted. Seriously. He's blinded by her. He sees the Rory he knew before the change, not her."  
  
Tristan sighed. "It seems she's pretty good at blinding people."  
  
  
  
  
  
Rory sat at the dining room table at Louise's, deep in thought. "Hey, Louise, can I use you phone?"  
  
Louise nodded and slid her cell phone across the table. Rory grabbed it and dialed a number. "Hello, this is Rory Gilmore."  
  
"Oh, um, hi. This is Josh."  
  
"Josh. It's great to hear your voice. Can I talk to Katherine for a minute?"  
  
"Oh, yeah, sure."  
  
Rory waited to speak until after Katherine answered. "Hi, Katherine, it's Rory."  
  
"Why are you calling here?"  
  
Rory sighed. "I thought I'd ask you as a friend to leave Tristan alone."  
  
Rory heard Katherine laugh. "We were never friends, Rory."  
  
Rory sighed again. "Oh, would you rather leave him alone now or wait until you've fallen in love with him? You know he's just like Ben."  
  
Rory could hear the other girl's frustration in her voice. "I'm not scared of you."  
  
"Maybe you should be."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Rory chuckled. "Well, since you're new this year, I'll explain. See, Tristan's obsessive. He was addicted to me in sophomore year and junior year. And frankly, I doubt this year will be any different."  
  
Katherine's voice sounded a little strangled. "Go to hell, you bitch." Click.  
  
Rory was stunned. Turning to Louise, she said, "She hung up on me. No one has ever hung up on me."  
  
Louise sighed. "Ror, that last comment was pretty bitchy. It was below you. It was desperate." Louise continued to file her nails.  
  
  
  
  
  
Jess entered Luke's diner from the back, trying to come in unnoticed. "You're late." Luke's voice rang in Jess's ears.  
  
"Sorry, Luke."  
  
Luke sighed, throwing Jess a dishtowel. "Yeah, I don't have time to yell at you. Go dry table two."  
  
Jess dried the table and turned back to Luke. "I saw Christopher's house yesterday."  
  
Luke froze. "How was it?"  
  
"Cold and distant. Museum-like."  
  
Luke nodded. "I figured. It sucks Rory has to live there."  
  
Jess shrugged. "She seems to like it."  
  
Luke's eyes grew sad. "Remember when Rory and Lorelai would come in here and just drink coffee for hours straight?"  
  
Jess nodded. "Or when Lorelai would beg for hours straight. You didn't just give her coffee, Luke."  
  
Luke sighed. "I miss them."  
  
Jess nodded again. "So do I, Luke."  
  
  
  
____________________________________________________________  
  
AN- I know that chapter was short and nothing happened. Next chapter will be better. More will happen. I promise. 


	4. What's this?

After school Monday, Rory approached Tristan, telling him her car still wasn't fixed. "So, I need a ride home," she concluded.  
  
Tristan sighed. "Yeah, okay, Rory. Come with me."  
  
The two were quiet for the first five minutes or so of the ride, until Rory turned towards Tristan. "Why do you hate me?"  
  
Tristan shook his head. "I don't hate you, Rory. I'm just... uncomfortable around you."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Tristan sighed. "You were so different. Now you're just like them."  
  
Rory looked at him questioningly. "The rest of who?"  
  
"The Magdelenes."  
  
Rory was offended. "Pull over."  
  
Tristan turned to her, the expression on his face making it clear he thought she was crazy. "We're on the highway."  
  
Rory bit her lip. "So what. Pull over. I want to get out."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Rory was angry, but she knew she couldn't get out of the car right now. "Fine, just do'nt talk to me."  
  
Tristan was quiet for the rest of the ride, until they pulled into Rory's driveway. "I'm sorry," he mumbled.  
  
"Well, I think we're passed that point."  
  
"Ror-"  
  
Rory was fuming. "What are you going to do next, call me a whore?"  
  
Tristan shook his head. "Rory, I-"  
  
Once again, Rory cut him off. "I should have known you'd be the same. God, just because I've changed everybody assumes I'm a slut. I figured you wouldn't buy into it."  
  
Tristan frowned. "I'm sorry, Rory."  
  
"Yeah, right. Uh-huh. I'm sure. That's about as likely as... I don't know. Paris being my best friend."  
  
"Rory."  
  
"What, Tristan? What are you going to say next? Are you going to give me the number to some strip club you like. Say you'll see me there? That the third pole's mine?"  
  
Tristan was shocked. "I-I'd never-"  
  
"What Tristan. You'd never what? Trust me? Be nice? Not jump to conclusions?"  
  
Rory went to get out of the car and Tristan became desperate. He jumped out of the car as well and chased Rory up to the entrance of her house. Rory turned around right as he reached her. "What now, Tristan? You want to see if I'll let you in? So you can prove I'm easy? God, I hate you." Tristan pulled Rory to him and wrapped her in his strong arms. Instantly, his lips found hers. Her hands tangled in his hair, her mouth opened, inviting his tongue in. Tristan hands wandered down Rory's back, and they kissed passionately until they were both out of breath. Rory looked up at him, her eyelids heavy. "Do you want to come in?" Tristan just nodded, his lips finding hers again.  
  
The two made their way up the stairs towards Rory's room, their lips still attached, and Rory whispered that her father wasn't home, hinting towards more. Finally, they reached her room and Tristan wasted no time in taking off Rory's shirt. She moaned as his hand touched her breast and reached down to take off his shirt. Her hands roamed his sculpted abdominal muscles as she kissed him carnally. He stared at her full breast in awe, unclasping the front clasp as he did. Then he stopped. "Rory," he said.  
  
"Mmm. Why'd you stop?"  
  
Tristan brought his fingertip lightly to her breast. "What's this," he asked, his voice making it clear he feared the answer. 


	5. The Truth

Paris stared at Jess angrily across a table at Luke's Diner. "No. The assignment was a debate on a major topic of women's rights during the British Industrial Revolution."  
  
Jess sighed angrily. "Birth control was a major topic. Gellar, women were DYING because it was forbidden by the Catholic Church. What's more major than that?"  
  
Paris narrowed her eyes. "Lets pick a topic that Mr. Borris would be able to sit through comfortably."  
  
Jess groaned. "Like what?"  
  
"Women as doctors."  
  
Jess knew to argue with Paris was pointless. "Fine."  
  
Paris grinned triumphantly. "Danes, we'll get an A on this. I promise you."  
  
Jess snickered. "Just an A? I'd expect at least an A+ out of you, Gellar."  
  
Paris nodded, missing the insult. "We will get an A+. The past will not keep me out of Harvard."  
  
Jess laughed. "Finally, something we agree on. What's the point in learning about the past? It's over?"  
  
Paris raised her eyebrows. "To prevent making the same mistakes," she said, grinning. Jess scowled and immaturely stuck out his tongue at her. It was a well known fact that Jess had made some major mistakes that had forced him to leave Stars Hollow High. Paris joked he had been trying to emulate the pranks that the little boy in the Christmas song, "I'm Getting Nothing For Christmas" had pulled. Literally. Jess had actually put a tack on the principal's chair so that during morning announcements he'd yelp. And Jess had been happy it worked.  
  
Jess sulked. "I've been better since then."  
  
Paris grinned. "I know, Jess. I know."  
  
  
  
  
  
Rory brought her hand up to her breast, covering the mark Tristan had seen. "I cut myself on glass. The scar never went away."  
  
Tristan frowned. "How?"  
  
Rory sighed, pulling her shirt back on, the mood now ruined. "There was a little fire in the kitchen a few weeks ago. I panicked, broke a window, and crawled out." She looked down at her feet.  
  
Tristan put his hand on her shoulder, trying to comfort her. "That's nothing to be embarrassed about."  
  
Rory smiled oddly. "Yeah, it is. I could have left the room by one of three doors."  
  
Tristan laughed. "Oh."  
  
Rory caught his eye with hers. "Tristan. Could you not tell anyone about this- any of this? It would be kind of embarrassing."  
  
Tristan nodded. "Yeah, sure." Grabbing his shirt, he sighed. "I should go now. Bye, Ror- Mary."  
  
Rory smiled at this, noticing he was trying to get on her good side again. "Bye." She watched him as he left and she frowned, picking her bra up off the floor. "You're already on my good side, Tristan DuGrey," she said quietly as she looked out her window, watching him drive away.  
  
  
  
  
  
Dear Journal,  
  
I almost slept with Tristan. Then he saw my scar, and the mood was, well, ruined. I feel really bad because I'm with Jess. Jess doesn't deserve this. But I like Jess. Maybe there's still a chance I'll win this bet after all. God knows I need the money.  
  
  
  
  
  
It's me- Tristan. The last time I wrote in here was a few months ago. But I'm back. I found out something today- I'm still not over Rory. You'd never understand how much I wanted her today. But I couldn't- not just because of the scar and what I thought when I saw it. But because she's Rory. Or Mary. Or whatever the hell you want to call her. I know that even if she says she is, she's not ready. And I respect that. Plus, I'm not good enough for her. And what I thought today just proves it.  
  
  
  
  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
I just got back from Stars Hollow. I was talking to Jess. I feel bad for him. He trusts Rory- and he shouldn't. I know this. She's not exactly loyal. Rory's... Rory. Not daughter of Lorelai Gilmore, but daughter of Christopher Hayden. Never thought there'd be such a difference. If only Jess saw it.  
  
  
  
  
  
Chronicle of Jess Danes ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Entry 26  
  
Yep, I'm back. Paris suckered me into some doctor theme for our report. I still think birth control would be better... Anyway, I called Rory and she didn't answer the phone. I'm worried about her. She seemed... preoccupied the last few days. 


	6. A Bad Day

Katherine was waiting for Rory by her locker the next morning. "I need to talk to you."  
  
Rory looked down at the girl, appalled. "Go back to your nerdy friends and make an appointment."  
  
Katherine's hands flew to her hips. "Rory, now."  
  
Rory sighed loudly, making it clear this was not on the top of her to-do list. "What do you want, Wilder?"  
  
"If you ever call my house again, I will kick your ass. I'm not afraid of you. You are a disgusting piece of work. And I overheard you talking to Louise. A bet? You use people like that? That is so warped. But I'm not worried. He's smart. He won't fall for it."  
  
Rory tapped her foot impatiently. "Katherine, hon, I've got to get to my first period class. Maybe we can discuss this later. Just check with my secretary first, darlin'." Rory's voice was sarcastic but sugarcoated.  
  
Katherine groaned. "No. It would be a waste of my time. Apparently, nothing makes it through your hair and to your brain." With that, she stalked off.  
  
Rory turned just in time to see Louise coming. "These people just can't get enough of me."  
  
Louise rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right. Uh, Rory, we need to go to the hospital today."  
  
Rory's face fell. "Louise, I told you to use birth control. Now you'll need to have those awful tests done again."  
  
Louise sighed. "Not that. No, Madeline called me this morning. Her mom tried again."  
  
Rory bit her lip. "Oh. Is Madeline here?"  
  
Louise nodded. "Yeah. In the bathroom."  
  
  
  
  
  
"Madeline." Rory called out her name, walking into the bathroom. Madeline stood by the sink, eyes red and her skin blotchy. "Oh, come here, Mad." Rory gave Madeline a reassuring hug and Madeline cried on her shoulder. "It will be okay. Mad, I promise you that."  
  
Madeline bit her lip to keep from crying more. "This is the second time this month."  
  
Rory nodded sympathetically. "I know. It's okay though?" Madeline nodded, trying to look brave. Rory smiled. "Do you know what's not okay?" After a brief pause, she said, "Your face! Lets fix it. I have a powder with me." Rory pulled out a lot of makeup out of her bag, comforting Madeline in the only way she knew.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Miss Gilmore, your paper?"  
  
Rory froze. "Ugh, I forgot it. I had it on my desk and it was all done and then I got distracted and I forgot it. Can I hand it in tomorrow?"  
  
"No."  
  
Rory fought to keep tears from spilling. "But Mr. Mulchaney, it's done."  
  
"If I changed the rules for you, I'd have to change them for everyone."  
  
Rory sighed dejectedly. "Okay, Mr. Mulchaney."  
  
  
  
  
  
After school, Rory met Louise in the courtyard. Louise dangled her car keys towards Rory. "You drive. I skipped last period for a beer."  
  
Rory sighed. "You really have to stop doing that, Louise."  
  
Rory took the keys and the two girls walked towards Louise's Mercedes. Getting in, Rory sighed. Flexing her fingers on the steering wheel, she said, "This has been one bad day and it's about to get even worse."  
  
  
  
  
  
"Madeline said it was room 204." Rory nodded and pulled Louise down the hallway, pausing at the door to room 204. Taking a deep breath, she threw it open. "Hey, it's me and Louise. We're happy to see you."  
  
Madeline's mother frowned. "It's not like I wanted to be here," she quipped.  
  
Rory found this comment disgusting but refrained from saying so. "Well, we're happy you're okay."  
  
Madeline's mother frowned. "I should have taken all the pills, not just 30."  
  
Louise shook her head. "No, you shouldn't have. We like having you here. We don't want you to leave."  
  
Rory looked at Louise curiously. She always knew just what to say. "Yes, we love having you here. You make the world a better place." Rory winced. Unlike Louise, she didn't know exactly what to say to someone who had just attempted suicide. Whatever she said sounded to fake.  
  
The door creaked open and Madeline walked in. Upon seeing her two best friends, her face lit up. "Hey Rory, Louise. I'm so happy you came." She looked towards her mother apprehensively and took a few hesitant steps towards her. "How are you feeling, Mom?"  
  
"Fine, darling. Did you have a good day?"  
  
"Wonderful." Madeline's voice was strained.  
  
"Good, sweetheart. I'm glad to hear that."  
  
Madeline nodded. The rest of the visit was just as awkward.  
  
  
  
  
  
By the time Rory got home, she was worn out. The day had been terrible and she couldn't even talk to her mother about it. She sighed, walking up the stairs to her room slowly. Dropping her bag on the floor, the desire to cry overwhelmed her. But she knew she could make it all better, at least for a few minutes. Shaking with unshed tears, she walked quickly into her bathroom, and reaching into the back of the bottom draw of her vanity, she pulled out an object, thin and sharp. Slowly, she pulled her shirt over her head and moved her bra down and scraped the blade of the razor over her breast, relishing the pain. It was her little secret, and nobody, not even Tristan, would know. She was careful to hide it, cutting herself only in areas that nobody would see, even in her skimpiest bikini. As she put the razor blade down, she finally let the tears win, cascading over her face with such a strong force.  
  
  
  
  
  
Dear Journal,  
  
Today was a terrible day. Madeline's mom tried to commit suicide. I didn't know what to say. And I feel guilty. I cut myself again. I know it's wrong, but how else can I deal with the pain I feel inside me? I feel like my life's out of control, that no matter what happens, I'll get hurt. For the past six months I've been doing this, and it's never had any real consequences. But now- the scars are taking longer to go away. And I'm worried- did Tristan believe my story? Or does he know how dirty I am, a level of dirty not even whores can reach? All I know is- I've lost control. My life is spiraling out of my power and I can't do anything to stop it. I miss my mother. I wish I could talk to her about this. I can't talk to my dad or Sherri. They'd never understand. I wouldn't fit Sherri's image of the perfect daughter. So what? I've already failed everybody else, including my own mother. Man, I need the money from that bet. I need to make Tristan fall for me.  
  
  
  
  
  
**************************************************************************** ************  
  
AN- I know it's short. My next chapters are longer- at least twice this. I don't have a lot of time right now. Next chapter should be up Wednesday or Thursday. 


	7. Author's Note...Sorry

Um, I need to stop this story for a while. Life's too complicated right now and I have too many ideas going on in my head.

And Jewls13, I think it is- If you are really like the Rory in this story, I suggest you get help. If you ever need to talk, just email me.


End file.
